I was walking down the road,
One day…
In my little conformist life…
Going to work or school or some shit…
Or on my way back home…
Getting groceries…
or thinking about what my career path would lead to…
I’m telling you…
it was just a normal day…
like so many we have had before…
He showed up with a crowd of other animals… dusty and wonderful…
A crow on his shoulder…
Piercing the air with her black eyes…
All dancing to the tune of wind…
His rags flying…

His eyes locked with mine
His gaze
His gay gaze
His unhazed gay gaze
His …

I was in him and he was in,
me…
He was my Melcom.
My Fred…
My dear Bell…
My beloved Paulo…
My David…
He was…
My… Che…
Not those they tell you about… in your books…
He smelled of weed and strawberries in a summer evening…
of books… under a heavy blanket… late in a winter night…
Of how earth smells in a forest after the rain…
Of dynamite…
With a wrinked touch so soft and warm…
and as he kissed my heart with his tongue…
I saw the world with his mad eyes…
Every flower was making love…
Every tree pouring semen in the air…
all the animals in the full circle of embrace…
Making babies of the world…
Making more… of life… in their crazy crazy dance… that keeps on going…

He held his hands out…
And in his palm was a small black pebble
The one I found on that shore
Some twenty years ago…
And lost somewhere down the road…

May 2024
Malmö

————————————-

Sitting on my rags on the ground
I look at you across the street
     high chair
           little sterile office
My crow friend screams at me
I give her head a kiss
Rubbing my nose to her beak

I look into her beautiful eyes
“yeah…
          It’s ’bout time my love…”
She nods
I shall give you what he gave me…
My nostrils shakes
My anticipation builds…

I rub the back of my wrinkled hand,
Veins slide over one another…
       rattle snakes stretching in the sand…
            Rings touchin’….
                   Click clack
Stones jingle around my wrist
breaking
     the dim light of your city,
           crawling in the middle of soothe
               and dirt,
                        and sadness of your life.

I raise my head
I exhale the smell of spring
Your plastic office plant blooms
You look up in disbelief,
As your tired eyes catch mine

I stand up
Slowly
My joints cracking
My muscles shake
My dusty hair flows high in the air
My tattooed arms raise
My dark eyes locked into your life
I breath in
The polluted air
Out of your lungs
And you choke on the lies….
That you told yourself…

My pulse beats on your ear drums
And I dance
And I dance
And I dance
And I dance
And I dance
And I dance
And I dance

And I sing
The song your mother sang for you
Before you where you!
Your real mother
The one we share

Blood rushes to your head
Your hands jittery
You want to reach for comfort
You want to search for safety
But only the truth will set you free
In the space between two tears
Running down your cheeks

Now, look at me…
Deep inside my chest
At the sparrow singing the death howls of great whales
Look!
As I rip open my ribs
Setting her flying across the asphalt road…
watch!
as she catches fire in the dirty light of your city…
watch that ball of fire blow into a thousand shards of light…
Look!!
As a shard cuts through your chest!

Listen!

You can hear her from inside…
cries of grief…
rattles of feather…

Now!
inhale!

Falling down on my trembling knees,
I hear my roots cracking your concrete grounds in search of songs…
As a single tear drops from her black eyes…
As I kiss her with these lips one last time…
As I lift my head one last time…
As the light leaves my fierce eyes…
“I dub thee a free motherfucker!”

June 2024
Malmö